3 Effective Ways to Improve Your Social Skills


Develop your social skills

Having a good set of social skills can make you not just a good communicator, but an effective one. The difference between the two is that, as a good communicator, you can communicate with other people without difficulty. While as an effective communicator, you can communicate AND develop a deep connection with other people, allowing you to build good relationship with them, increasing your social support network.

Unfortunately, we aren’t born with good social skills; like any other skill, we need to acquire them through trial and error and repeated practice. With that said, here are 3 effective ways that you –whether you’re the most awkward or the most charismatic person- can do to improve your social skills.

– Overcome Your Fear And Your Social Anxieties

The two most common social anxieties are starting conversations and keeping them going. These are  especially true when you are anxious. Fight your anxiety by telling yourself that there’s nothing wrong with making conversations and that people will actually appreciate you more if you do.

The task is, of course, not easy to do. But it can be done if you really want it and if you come up with a game plan based on three basic elements, which include: an accepting attitude toward your fear over communicating, working on steps for dealing with it, and a willingness to become a well communicator.

– Get Involved And Make A Conversation

Well, it all starts with having yourself involved. If you don’t get yourself involved in a conversation, even if you have overcome your fear and anxieties, you can never improve if you don’t get involved. So take this step. Today, talk to someone you don’t usually talk to.

You can start a conversation by saying something general and not too personal, for example, you could:

  • Talk about the weather; say something like, “it’s a great summer day, isn’t it?”
  • Pay a compliment; say something like, “That pumps look great on you!”
  • Make an observation; you can say something like, “I noticed that you were reading a Bronte book, is that the “Wuthering Heights?””, or something like, (I noticed that you’re reading a book about bikes, do you have one?”; or
  • Introduce yourself; simply approach and say something like, “Hi, I don’t think we have met, I’m…”).

You don’t have to say anything you’re not comfortable about or anything that will sound made up. Just be sincere and genuine. People’s instinct could tell them you’re genuine and so they will have this good feeling towards you and would be interested in talking with you too.

– Build Your Self-esteem

This step here is about building your confidence in yourself. You need it as it is a great help in turning you into an effective communicator. Have you noticed during certain times when you were assured and confident with yourself that you were able to communicate better and were able to share more of your ideas to your family and friends? That’s what happens when you trust yourself and when there is confidence within.

There are many ways to build your self-esteem. One simple, but effective way, is to surround yourself with strong, well-intentioned people who support you or share your interests. There’s nothing better than having this kind of people in your life. They are not just helpful in your quest to become a confident, effective communicator, but in other aspects of your life as well.

Another effective way is to read books and other materials available on developing self-esteem. There is a wealth of resources out there. Look for some and I’m sure you’ll learn some things useful in building your self-esteem. Once you have built your self-esteem, you’ll have higher chances at improving your social skills.